Nosesplash: | noz spl-ash | (noun) When liquid shoots out of one’s nose as a direct result of laughing (verb) To cause someone to shoot liquid (a beverage or otherwise) out of their nose as a direct result of laughing About the Author Nate Smith is a Portland based comedian and writer. Find out more about Nate Smith. Like what you see? Let us know! People You Should Know Oyl (oylintokyo) Joe (503creative) var gaJsHost = (("https:" == document.location.protocol) ? "https://ssl." : "http://www."); document.write(unescape("%3Cscript src='" + gaJsHost + "google-analytics.com/ga.js' type='text/javascript'%3E%3C/script%3E")); try { var pageTracker = _gat._getTracker("UA-6101155-1"); pageTracker._trackPageview(); } catch(err) {}Tumblr (3.0; @nosesplash)http://nosesplash.com/<img src="http://17.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kt86c5NtrM1qzfx39o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>This automatic sink in the airport bathroom is taunting me! Anytime I come anywere near it turns on. I don’t want your water you stupid sink!</p>http://nosesplash.com/post/246480968http://nosesplash.com/post/246480968Mon, 16 Nov 2009 18:23:57 -0500“A sign for Alton, IL says, “Welcome to Alton. Let yourself go!” It seems like the people of Alton really have let themselves go.”http://nosesplash.com/post/245673859http://nosesplash.com/post/245673859Mon, 16 Nov 2009 00:29:49 -0500<img src="http://18.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ks3shkyWDz1qzfx39o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/>http://nosesplash.com/post/223470257http://nosesplash.com/post/223470257Mon, 26 Oct 2009 00:00:55 -0400“Millions today are mourning the passing of the rumor of Kanye West’s passing.”http://nosesplash.com/post/219683100http://nosesplash.com/post/219683100Thu, 22 Oct 2009 00:13:57 -0400“Police have determined the balloon boy situation was a hoax. They are also certain that the boy’s name, Falcon, is a hoax.”http://nosesplash.com/post/217248388http://nosesplash.com/post/217248388Mon, 19 Oct 2009 12:00:30 -0400“I have a cute nickname for my wife. I call her “Buttercup.” But I leave out the “ercup” part.”http://nosesplash.com/post/216749760http://nosesplash.com/post/216749760Sun, 18 Oct 2009 21:46:50 -0400“I took a personality test and the results came back “not-applicable.””http://nosesplash.com/post/211516038http://nosesplash.com/post/211516038Mon, 12 Oct 2009 21:04:45 -0400“The creator of Hooters is opening a new chain of comedy clubs called “Hoo Hoos & Ha Has.””http://nosesplash.com/post/208597055http://nosesplash.com/post/208597055Fri, 09 Oct 2009 14:49:35 -0400“Obama has openly rejected the possibility that racism is the main reason for the criticism he is receiving. Doing so he has turned down the option to play both the “race card” and the “get out of jail free card.””<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news - <a target="_blank" href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/19/health/policy/19obama.html?hp">nytimes.com</a></em>http://nosesplash.com/post/191577446http://nosesplash.com/post/191577446Sat, 19 Sep 2009 02:42:43 -0400obamaracismfunnycomedynosesplash<img src="http://8.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kq1qbePSid1qzfx39o1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>I watched the premiere of the new Jay Leno Show last night…did he steal Arsenio Hall’s old set?</p>http://nosesplash.com/post/189078739http://nosesplash.com/post/189078739Wed, 16 Sep 2009 00:11:38 -0400“Elton John’s attempt to adopt a Ukranian orphan has been rejected. The reason? The Ukranian officials saw his giant sunglasses and thought he was Kim Jong Ill.”<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news</em>http://nosesplash.com/post/188617335http://nosesplash.com/post/188617335Tue, 15 Sep 2009 12:18:28 -0400“Kanye West says, “George Bush and the VMA Awards do not care about black people!””<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news</em>http://nosesplash.com/post/187991363http://nosesplash.com/post/187991363Mon, 14 Sep 2009 18:03:53 -0400“After 30 years, the US has finally agreed to have a face to face talk with Iran. First topic of discussion: “Ellen on American Idol? Really?””<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news - <a target="_blank" href="http://www.presstv.ir/detail.aspx?id=106002&sectionid=351020101">presstv.ir</a></em>http://nosesplash.com/post/186181278http://nosesplash.com/post/186181278Sat, 12 Sep 2009 12:07:59 -0400USIranobamaellenamerican idolcomedyfunnynosesplash“I like to mess with people by going onto the Craigslist housing section and listing “Condor for Rent.””http://nosesplash.com/post/184884276http://nosesplash.com/post/184884276Thu, 10 Sep 2009 20:20:39 -0400“Hugh Hefner has filed for divorce from his wife, claiming irreconcilable differences. The difference? That his wife knew what “irreconcilable” meant.”<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news - reuters.com</em>http://nosesplash.com/post/184261973http://nosesplash.com/post/184261973Thu, 10 Sep 2009 00:46:56 -0400“Hugh Hefner has filed for divorce from his wife, claiming irreconcilable differences. Hugh chose this reason because there wasn’t an “upgrade to new model” option.”<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news - reuters.com</em>http://nosesplash.com/post/184099930http://nosesplash.com/post/184099930Wed, 09 Sep 2009 21:05:00 -0400“Republican Assemblyman Mike Duvall resigned today after he accidentally made comments about having sex with 2 women over a microphone at a hearing, inadvertently causing 50 people to throw up in their mouths just a little.”<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news</em>http://nosesplash.com/post/184062990http://nosesplash.com/post/184062990Wed, 09 Sep 2009 20:18:56 -0400“Jon Gosselin has accused Kate of stealing his wedding ring. He says he wants it back because chicks dig married men.”<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news - <a target="_blank" href="http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20302916,00.html?xid=rss-topheadlines">people.com</a></em>http://nosesplash.com/post/182955035http://nosesplash.com/post/182955035Tue, 08 Sep 2009 13:33:20 -0400jon and kate plus 8jonkategosselincomedyfunnynosesplash“Authorities arrested a woman in Sudan for wearing pants. Meanwhile in Alabama, authorities arrested a woman in a Sedan for not wearing pants.”<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news - <a target="_blank" href="http://www.reuters.com/article/africaCrisis/idUSL8678488">reuters.com</a></em>http://nosesplash.com/post/182903639http://nosesplash.com/post/182903639Tue, 08 Sep 2009 12:05:38 -0400sudanpantssedanalabamaarrestedcomedynosesplashfunny“President Obama says he is ready to take a firmer stand on the healthcare debate. In other words, he’s inviting all of Congress to the White House for a beer.”<br/><br/> - <em>nosesplash news - <a target="_blank" href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/09/06/AR2009090602336.html?hpid=topnews">washington post</a></em>http://nosesplash.com/post/182393151http://nosesplash.com/post/182393151Mon, 07 Sep 2009 20:34:28 -0400obamawhite housebeercongresshealth carenosesplashcomedyfunny