Nate Smith's Nosesplash
Brought to you by the Best Nate Smith Ever.
You guys have no idea what I had to type into google image search to find this image.
My favorite color is glitter.
The other day Chandler did something that is now haunting my dreams. I recently began wearing glasses again (I’m hoping it will help me get more laughs on stage) and Chandler loves to grab at them. The other day I was holding Chandler in one arm (yeah, I’m THAT strong) and he started to grab for my glasses. So with my other hand (yeah, I’m THAT coordinated) I removed my glasses and held them away from him.
Chandler reached for the glasses once and realized he wasn’t going to be able to reach them so he turned his gaze on me. He gave me this look like he was saying, “If I can’t have your glasses then I will HAVE YOUR FACE!”
Then with two hands he grabbed my cheeks and dug his jagged little baby finger nails so deep I could taste them. I immediately screamed. I didn’t know what to do! I couldn’t drop him, mainly because I was afraid if I let go he’d just hang from my face and eventually pull it off. And I had my glasses in my other hand so I had no hands left to remove his talons.
All I could do was rush over to my wife and beg her to pry the demon child off my face. After doing so, Chandler turned to her and raised his hands to her face. Ashley gave him a stern “NO!” which caused Chandler to recoil and burst into tears. Ashley consoled him but I just laughed at him, and then tended to my face wounds.
TL;DR
Ahem…
Found at davidvienna:
I heard you’re a bit down. You know what will cheer you up? A killer banana.
